Time to give me a little TLC

After all the angst and tears yesterday, I decided to pamper myself a little and I wanted ice cream.

I went to Sonic and got an ice cream then came home and decided to "treat" myself with a home spa night. The eyebrows had grown to one again, the toes and feet were in need of some serious pampering and the hair on my legs was beginning to really need attention.

Last time I was at Target, I got a home waxing kit and decided to put it to use -- legs, bikini area, brows, the works. Before you laugh and say I'm insane, I've done this before. No, seriously, I've done a leg and bikini wax at home before without incident. I do it because I'm too scared embarrassed cheap have it done at a salon. The eyebrows, well, I have done those successfully and not successfully, but decided to give it a go. I was feeling brave.

I got the package from under the bathroom sink, read the instructions and gathered the necessary stuff. It is important to note at this point that in the instructions it said (and I quote) "Lavender Spa Body Wax is the perfect wax to remove hair from your delicate, sensitive skin." I followed the instructions for heating the wax, got the tongue depressor-looking application sticks and the removal strips all ready and set to work on my legs first. I quickly decided that (1) the hair on my legs is too fine or (2) the hair on my legs was too short. It wasn't working well, so, undeterred, I moved to the eyebrows.

My skin is very pale and sensitive, so it was no surprise to me when I turned REALLY red around my brows. It always does, even when I go have it done at the salon. I got my eyebrows done with little fuss, but afterwards noticed that the skin around my left eyebrow was stinging a bit. I applied the "Post Treatment Soothing Azulene oil" to the area and moved on to the bikini area. I had no plans to, and didn't go "Brazilian." I wanted to remove just in enough that I could wear a swimsuit if I were 50 lbs. lighter. I won't go into the gory details, but suffice it to say that uncomfortable is an understatement, but excruciating is a slight exaggeration about right. I didn't remember it hurting that badly before. At this point, I was beginning to wonder if I had really made the correct decision for my choice of pampering.

I got in the shower to clean up afterwards and was greeted with searing pain of water meeting raw flesh. I think I ripped half the skin off of my eyebrows and the bikini line.... oh my!!!! It only got about half of the hair on my legs, but all the skin around my eyes!! Remember the quote from above... it should have read: "Lavender Spa Body Wax is the perfect wax to remove hair from your delicate, sensitive skin." I did it just like they said! I kept the strip close to the skin as I pulled it off and didn't pull up! I applied only a thin layer. Brand new kit meet trash.

It wasn't until later that I realized I'd always used a product called Nads before. It's water soluble, it is gentle, and was lovingly created by a mother for her hairy daughter. Yeah, the stuff I got was really, really sticky and so NOT water soluble. I was also not so gentle and obviously created by someone who is evil.

Fast forward to this morning. I trudged into the bathroom this morning around 6:45 (I showered last night, so got a precious 15 extra minutes of sleep.... ) and looked in the mirror. My left eye, the one with very little skin around it any more, is all swollen. I look like I have been in a fight and didn't come out on the winning end. The bikini area is still red, but thankfully not raw still and my legs are just polka dotted (every hair follicle that had hair removed is red) and I have cat fur stuck to the wax that I didn't come off in the shower after using their special oil and baby oil and soap. REALLY attractive.

Oh, and I never did get to my toes. Maybe another night.